Clouds of Darkness


I’ve finally come through my ordeal.
Normality, is how I feel.
For several years I’ve been so ill,
I’ve had no strength, and had no will.
I’ve been so low, so tired and lost,
Angry, lonely, sad and cross.

I felt that I was all alone,
Had no loved ones, no family, no home.
Just wanted to run far far away,
And find myself a new place to stay.
A sanctuary where I could just be me,
And not who you all wanted me to be.

I didn’t want this new life of mine.
The responsibilities were far too high.
There was no enjoyment, no praise, no fun,
The reasons why I wanted to run.
Where had my old life gone to now?
I wanted to get it all back somehow.

But deep down inside I just needed love,
Support, understanding and all that sort of stuff.
Just wanted someone to hold me tight,
Saying “we’ll get through this together, you’ll be alright”.
But no-one tried to feel how I felt.
That bad deck of cards I had been dealt.

I didn’t ask for these demons of mine.
This was supposed to be a wonderful time.
But I carried this darkness around for years,...

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Tracy Windross
Apr 8 2020

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