Forbidden Fruit

They call it “misophonia” – when the sound of people eating induces disgust, repulsion, or even rage.

People tell me I suffer from it with apples, especially on the commuter trains when there’s no escape from the slow, sloshy, crunch of someone taking a deep bite and then masticating with the juices from the fruit from which all sin came.

Indeed, apples should be forbidden. Newton would agree. Healthy? No! Even doctors keep away!

Apples are an enemy attack on my senses. I wish I was brave enough to defend myself with the orange.

The orange – sweet and simple. Named after its fragrance; a fragrance that would reach the other passengers in my train carriage and make their mouths water. They’d crave what I have!

They’d watch me peel the dimpled skin and place it on a napkin. Great taste comes to those who prepare well, and the orange awaits like a present wrapped in its pithy wool.

I'd delight in their horror as they watch me scrape the fluffy pith with my fingernails, and then pick out the bits that got caught underneath. Heck, maybe I’d even bite my nails, give them a good chew, just to make it last longer!

I hold my naked orange aloft, like a priest with a Co...

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Paul Sterlini
Sep 14 2020

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Just brilliant!

Rod Webb
Sep 16 2020